notable things:
- got a shit job (but it paid well)
- went to japan twice
- watched sz's concert
- watched mari/sou concert
- otherwise, went to bangkok for holiday
- went back to beijing to supposedly do some productive stuff regarding house ownership, but ended up just eating a lot
- did a lot of things to my hair
- started uni
- pulled some shit for my classes
- for example, literally not studying for any tests ever, except last-minute cramming at 2am the day of the test
- deciding i couldn't give a fuck about 15 marks' worth of questions on my final, and just walking out of the exam hall a full hour before the end of the paper
- and other things classified under "not taking school seriously" and "being the worst student ever"
- got a b-average for my first semester
- got a tattoo
- got into bts
- bought too many things
starting 2017 with some personal salt to keep my blood pressure high:
i really hate it when people use the words "stubborn" (or any similar word for the same purpose) as a cover-all, be-all-end-all assessment of someone's character. all you're really doing is silencing them, because now whatever they say will be tempered with the quality of "stubbornness" that you accused them of being. it takes away credence from their words, no matter how true those words are.
"oh, they're just stubborn" implies that someone isn't insisting on a certain stance because they're convinced of its correctness, implies that they don't have rigorous evidence backing up their stance and is ONLY repeating their stance because they're stubborn and won't back down. "stubborn" just erases all the very valid points of their arguments and literally no one benefits except you, the accuser.
don't use "stubborn" to silence people when you're the one who backed down from an intellectual discussion because you couldn't take the stress of defending your own stance. i get it if you don't want to discuss something sensitive but don't blame others for your own sensitivities.
and on a personal level, don't fucking call me stubborn when i've changed my opinion to reflect facts so many times throughout my life. i don't change my opinions easily because i fucking have evidence to back my opinions up, so literally why the fuck would your emotional appeal take precedence over my evidence? if i were convinced by every emotional appeal that comes my way i'd change my mind 2 million times a day. this is not fucking being stubborn and i don't appreciate you calling me stubborn just because i won't agree with you.
so basically if you call me "stubborn" to avoid conflict then you'd better reconsider, because i WILL Get Started on this "stubborn" thing and all you'll get are more conflict and a Very Exceptionally Angrily Assertive Me.
tl;dr: be careful what you accuse me of being
if we're going to talk about 2017 resolutions, i'll probably bring up failed 2016 resolutions and why idgaf any more
among those resolutions: i wanted to become a nice, sweet, cheerful girl with an adorable personality. like, a bright existence. which failed because deep down i'm actually pretty mean, and i have too much neverending salt in me to be that girl. i'm too assertive to be nice.
if i hear any dumb shit, i WILL give you my "I Will Stuff That Bullshit Back Down Your Throat" smile. like, "you thought that problematic shit was funny, but i didn't, and if you say one more thing in that vein, i will open my mouth and drag your ass across the sahara desert, or so help me god"
and if they continue, i'll probably show them my expressionless, unamused face, which tends to shut down any thread of conversation real quick because there's just no emotional response at all, and people tend to find it hard to find anything to say in response to a non-response.
yes, i do in fact know how much of an ass i'm being at any given time. and if i'm being mean to you, you should consider either your continued association with me OR the shit coming out of your mouth
wow, it feels good to start off the year with salt. i hope my blood pressure stays within the normal range for 2017. low blood pressure makes me very irritable but too tired to verbalise and let go of the irritation.
in 2017 i also hope to have my life mostly organised, and have only small areas of localised chaos.
in 2017 i hope my boss stops asking me for anything other than tutoring her kids
in 2017 i hope to witness someone literally smacking someone down for being a bigot
in 2017 i hope for more cute idols and more cuteness from idols
in 2017 i hope i can earn more money so i can spend it all
in 2017 i hope for good music please god please
in 2017 the world had better sort itself out. i don't appreciate this fluctuating exchange rate, and worsening social problems, and the threat of fucking nuclear war. you know what i mean by "not appreciating" things. it means i fucking hate it with every fibre of my being
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