the real question is when i can move out

My mother never deals with the issue at hand.

She always makes it about her. "You're pissing me off." "You want to make me angry?" "All you do is make me angry!" 

She talks about herself dying all the time. "Do you want to kill me?" "I have high blood pressure! Keep it up and once my blood pressure hits 160 my blood vessels will just burst and I'll die here right in front of you."

She can't control herself once she gets angry. She literally snarls, throws things, breaks things, gets violent.

She makes herself even angrier. She stokes herself up. Once she's angry she gets even angrier.

And afterwards she talks about what a failure of a family this is.

What my mother gets angry about is evidently not my brother talking about wanting to remove my eyeballs and put grapes in their place or wanting to chop my hands off or hitting me incessantly. What my mother gets angry about is apparently how I scold my brother. She says I'm too unyielding. I need to be softer on my brother. 

Bullshit. She makes me so angry. She makes me so angry that I handle everything very gently, because if I don't, I might start breaking everything and not stop. When I get really angry, it's like there's a fire burning inside and my energy is the fuel. I find it hard to breathe and my body doesn't have much strength. It's all concentrated inside because I'm so fucking angry.

How dare she make everything about herself. 

There are actual problems waiting to be solved and she's wasting all our time, making herself out to be the sole victim.