12 November 2013

sometimes

sometimes i just hate myself
hate everything

it's not depression
i just hate everything

i hate existing
why must i exist?
what do these experiences mean?
after sadness and happiness
what is there
except death?

i hate everything
i hate that this world exists
i hate that i am sentient
i hate that i hate things at all

i hate myself
i hate everything

is this pathetic?
am i pathetic?
is anyone laughing at my immaturity?
because that would be better than life passing by

i want to die
and i hate myself for it

sometimes i just stop caring
but i still hate myself
and there isn't even a reason

it's all a mess
and i just want it to stop
i don't know what i want
and i hate it

and then i make myself stop 
and i go on with life
i continue to die

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