seriously, i feel like i might've reached zen or self-fulfilment or received enlightenment or something. i've suddenly come to the realisation that stressing over exams doesn't help at all - i mean, i knew that, before, that stressing doesn't help, but at that time i hadn't experienced what it was like to not stress over important exams. this time i threw my fucks into the wind and said goodbye, and oddly enough i feel like i could write better essays now that i stopped caring.
i don't think my grades will be any worse than usual, despite me not studying AT ALL (i am not joking about this) but i'll wait until the grades come out...
of course i'll need to study really hard for the final preliminary exams and the final a'levels, but it's good that i had this experience of a stress-free exam period. i don't mean to say that i didn't take this time's exams seriously, i just mean that i intentionally didn't study or cram before the exams, and took the exams seriously with the knowledge i already had. not only did i not study, i didn't discuss anything before or after the exams, and didn't let myself be pulled into the pit of half-joking half-serious frantic revision right before the exam.
we'll see how this goes, but i honestly think i achieved the same grades as usual, or maybe even better for some essays, since i wasn't half-delirious with stress. plus i felt great the whole time.
i have to say, however, that the subjects i take are ALL essay-based. i literally only have one subject that isn't - that's maths, and i can't fail any more at maths even if i didn't study. so it's different from chemistry or physics, because i don't think you can not study for those subjects and expect to do well.
it's pretty lonely tho, because all my friends are studying. that's about the only downside to this.
anyway it's been great, and i can't wait to see my results.
(after these exams i'm going to have to study like mad anyway, because this is literally the last time i can accept any mediocre grades -- am going to have to aim for straight As, and then achieve straight As, plus i have to write my independent study paper. so ironically this exam week is my last period of relaxation)
does anyone else have time management problems though? like i always have a ton of time left, but i can't bring myself to check my essays because there isn't enough time to change anything substantial anyway. i'd like to be able to finish like ten minutes before the end instead of half an hour. i want to like spend appropriate amounts of time pondering over the content of the essay instead of just finishing it?? OR they could have this thing where you can hand in the paper early and then go home ;;;;;;;; i wish they'd let me go off early
edit: guess what happened after my last paper (literature). old cranky mr prince said that he saw me just staring into space and would've let me off if i'd finished my paper. then he said "well that's too late now" in his british accent and all that went on in my brain was WHYYYYYYY oh my precious wasted time. i will never get you back.
edit: guess what happened after my last paper (literature). old cranky mr prince said that he saw me just staring into space and would've let me off if i'd finished my paper. then he said "well that's too late now" in his british accent and all that went on in my brain was WHYYYYYYY oh my precious wasted time. i will never get you back.
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