SLEEP

Yesterday night, I went to bed at 10pm. After falling asleep for a little while (I presume I did indeed fall asleep) I woke up again and became pissed about how I couldn't get back to sleep - I was tired as fuck after an entire day outside with my class but hell if my brain was going to let me sleep.

Oh, so guess what, it was 11.40pm when I finally decided to give up and look at the time. I thought that it'd be closer to 3 or 4 in the morning, but it was barely two hours after I went to bed.

Great, so I tossed and turned and fucking fumed before I completely gave up at about 12. This meant that I got out of bed and read manga until 3.15am.

Then I went to bed. And slept. Until 7am.

It seems like it's only one day, but these kind of things happen every single fucking time. Every fucking night, (or something like that, I have a bad memory) I wake up and spend too much time trying to get back to sleep. I wake up about three times per night. I always wake up before my alarm. I can never fall asleep within an hour.

Also, it seems like most of my sleep time is spent half-aware of whatever dream I'm having. Which, however nice it sounds, is shitty. I know it's cool to be able to be awake and asleep at the same time. But when you're tired as fuck, no. JUST NO.

I want to sleep normally okay? I don't want any stupid panda eyes. No more panda eyes.

Another thing is that I can function normally even if I sleep three hours a night (function as in I don't fall asleep standing up etc, can hold conversation etc, and can actually make logical decisions). I have no idea if it means I'm just awesome and efficient and don't need to sleep that much, or my definition of 'function' is too lax.

IDK but Phoebe seems to fall asleep everywhere even if she sleeps five hours. Like, seriously sleep. I find it hard to fall asleep anywhere, including my own fucking bed. MY OWN BED. UGH.

I think I compensate by lazing around on my bed the entire day. It makes me feel more rested. Somehow.

Oh god, I need to write something, but I'm either too tired to use my brain or too busy to sit down. Thinking of original stuff requires more brainpower than reading others' stuff. Right? Right.

I think I'm just rambling here. I have no fucking idea why I even started this post, but since I've started it I might as well post it up. GDI my holidays, my holidays, why are my holidays so packed? CIP and ROD and training camp and oh my fuck just thinking about it makes my brain hurt somewhat.

By the by, Dr. Seuss is just fucking creepy. His books give me nightmares. Kids should never read them. And no, I've never thought that it was spelled "Suess". That's just wrong.