Regarding fanfics about noncon, dubcon, and S&M

I am so sick of all of you going...

No, no, don't fuck me.


But yeah, I like it, it feels good.


Goddamn I hate myself.

Listen up, fuckers, if you write that sort of crap in your stories I will write you off as someone with zero originality. That's what everyone does - that's the standard stupid description.

Just to show my contempt for it, I will now write a humourous little parody drabble about Beyond Birthday and Raito-kun.

"Raito, pet," he says, trailing a pale hand down the smooth abdomen, "I know you like this."


The brunette moans, biting at his lip. He struggles, trying to throw the other male off, but the thin man is too strong, and his knees are weak from unwanted pleasure. Raito grunts, turning his face away from Beyond.


"Tell me you like this, and I'll let you cum," Beyond compromises softly. His other hand that is not molesting Raito is busy dripping hot wax onto the younger's nipples. Again, he can see the internal conflict in Raito's eyes. 


Stop this, those defiant eyes tell him, but the words are blocked by a gag on the pretty little mouth.


"But you want this," he whispers lightly in reply, thrusting into the teen under him. 


Raito whimpers involuntarily; it feels too good. He wants to remain indifferent, but it feels too good, and it's torture, and he hates himself for responding.


I don't know, I found it funny. Don't read it seriously, read it and start laughing spontaneously about how ridiculous that is. Seriously.

I mean, dude.

I've read fanfiction where the authors are extremely serious about their little dubcon scene, and they describe it so beeeaaauuutifully (excuse, I'll go get a tissue) BUT.

BUT.

You can't help laughing at least a little when you read stuff like, "A touches B's smooth skin tenderly, gazing into B's eyes, clearing seeing B's internal conflict (blah) but continuing to rape him (I'm substituting very vivid and awesome descriptions cause I'm lazy) etc". Such great descriptions...

So... I don't know, so inappropriate?

There's this line between good dubcon/noncon and bad dubcon.noncon trying to be good. Don't read it as a fangirl. Read it as a skeptic - like, what is this trash? (Sorry, Bleach reference there. I love Ulquiorra.) This kind of mindset would probably ruin your reading forever, but hey, at least you can now tell what's bad and what's good.

Good for you.

(Note: the excessive use of good and bad this this post is intentional, and not because I have run out of synonyms.)

P.S. I don't know about you, but I find my little drabble here kind of hot. Don't mind, me, just continue on your merry way. I'm probably not that reliable anyway.