the no studying challenge

so this week is hellfire exam week but i have literally not studied anything. it feels super weird to not worry about exams, but also very liberating. usually i feel like complete crap during exam week, and usually fall sick right after (stress, probably) but this time? i might actually be enjoying the whole "you can go home after the exam" thing.

seriously, i feel like i might've reached zen or self-fulfilment or received enlightenment or something. i've suddenly come to the realisation that stressing over exams doesn't help at all - i mean, i knew that, before, that stressing doesn't help, but at that time i hadn't experienced what it was like to not stress over important exams. this time i threw my fucks into the wind and said goodbye, and oddly enough i feel like i could write better essays now that i stopped caring.

i don't think my grades will be any worse than usual, despite me not studying AT ALL (i am not joking about this) but i'll wait until the grades come out... 

of course i'll need to study really hard for the final preliminary exams and the final a'levels, but it's good that i had this experience of a stress-free exam period. i don't mean to say that i didn't take this time's exams seriously, i just mean that i intentionally didn't study or cram before the exams, and took the exams seriously with the knowledge i already had. not only did i not study, i didn't discuss anything before or after the exams, and didn't let myself be pulled into the pit of half-joking half-serious frantic revision right before the exam.

we'll see how this goes, but i honestly think i achieved the same grades as usual, or maybe even better for some essays, since i wasn't half-delirious with stress. plus i felt great the whole time. 

i have to say, however, that the subjects i take are ALL essay-based. i literally only have one subject that isn't - that's maths, and i can't fail any more at maths even if i didn't study. so it's different from chemistry or physics, because i don't think you can not study for those subjects and expect to do well. 

it's pretty lonely tho, because all my friends are studying. that's about the only downside to this.

anyway it's been great, and i can't wait to see my results.

(after these exams i'm going to have to study like mad anyway, because this is literally the last time i can accept any mediocre grades -- am going to have to aim for straight As, and then achieve straight As, plus i have to write my independent study paper. so ironically this exam week is my last period of relaxation)

does anyone else have time management problems though? like i always have a ton of time left, but i can't bring myself to check my essays because there isn't enough time to change anything substantial anyway. i'd like to be able to finish like ten minutes before the end instead of half an hour. i want to like spend appropriate amounts of time pondering over the content of the essay instead of just finishing it?? OR they could have this thing where you can hand in the paper early and then go home ;;;;;;;; i wish they'd let me go off early

edit: guess what happened after my last paper (literature). old cranky mr prince said that he saw me just staring into space and would've let me off if i'd finished my paper. then he said "well that's too late now" in his british accent and all that went on in my brain was WHYYYYYYY oh my precious wasted time. i will never get you back.

my phone history

i think i've finally found THE phone for me. like i've never really especially wanted a phone, because it costs a lot, it's a bother to change phones, generally no phone was ever good enough for me to want to face all that hassle. but i've found it.

the lg g4 

literally it sounds like the phone of my dreams, except for the fugly back cover and the ui which i think could be prettier. but whatever i'm getting that phone as soon as my contract ends (which is very soon) and i just want everyone to know that i loVE that phone?? and i'm sure that once i have it in my hands i'll just love it more. 

let's recap my phone history - i got my first phone early, like when i was 7 or 8, because my parents were sick of me not being able to contact them. it was a basic nokia, which we kept until recently. it also worked until recently, although the keyboard piece would fly off whenever we dropped it (which was often). i think my brother finally crushed its spirit though, so i no longer see it around and assume that it's dead. [probably the nokia 3310 or something that looks like it]

the next phone was a nokia, with a snazzy red/white/black design and a black and white pixellated screen. i played snake on it a lot, even though you could hardly tell what anything was, since the pixels were fuckin huge. long story short, i killed it. the next phone was also a nokia (yes my family was a nokia fan) which was white and pretty good-looking. i can't remember what the screen was like though. maybe a colour screen. long story short i think i dropped it in a toilet somewhere and it started malfunctioning so i had to get another one. the next one was also a nokia (i think). it was the one with a full keyboard and was cute af. i think i also killed it in due time. [maybe nokia e73/e72/e63/e71 i was looking it up and everything looks the same?? i really can't remember

all the phones i've had up until then were my dad's old phones, or spares that he had lying around (and my dad always has spares phones lying around). the next phone i had was one of those popular ones that everyone wanted and was the first new phone i had. a sony ericsson, i think. well, i killed it within a year..... [probably the sony ericsson w705 in red and white]

then i got another nokia, touchscreen one with a stylus. which i quickly killed. [probably nokia 5233/5230 in black] the i got a nokia with the slide out keyboard. [nokia n97 mini in black] which i loved a lot, but also ultimately killed by smashing the audiojack area. after that i think i got another nokia? can't really remember - but i smashed the screen pretty completely, after which my dad handed me another nokia of the same model in a different colour, which i smashed in exactly rhe same way about half a year later. [probably both nokia c7, in black and grey] i liked all these three phones a lot, actually, and i wish there were more like them.

then i got an [xperia v], which was actually one of the phones that i didn't trash!! my dad had to give it back to the office or something, so i got my mom's used [iphone 5c], which... uh... just malfunctioned one day after less than a month. my dad took it to the shop and they told him that the chip just died. so now i have a huawei phone with a cracked screen to tide me over until my contract ends. it was either huawei or the s4, which shut down every time we tried to use mobile data, so it was pretty useless to me. in the short time that i had the huawei, i cracked the screen... more.

currently this is probably my thirteenth phone or something. i think i actually missed a few phones along the way, but whatever. i've had more phones than most people, and my phones last on average less than a year. so... wow. i never realised until now. i'm pretty spoiled, huh. 

did my parents ever confiscate my phone? yeah, i think like once. i was caught playing with my phone in class when i was twelve, and they confiscated it for a week. so during the week, i forgot my bus card one day, and couldn't call my parents for help. in the end i just told the bus driver and he just let me get on. of course i bitched about it to my parents afterwards and they never tried to take away my phone again lol. 

incidentally i'm pretty much the number one technology destroyer, and i have all sorts of funny stories about technology malfunctioning the moment i touch it. my friends joke about it all the time but i don't think it's a coincidence that i've wrecked a TON of electronics - once i wrecked a brand new desktop with some of the best specs at that time and everything, turns out i wrecked the MOTHERBOARD like how does that even happen. everyone's just used to things breaking down around me.

[life update: fell sick a couple of days ago. am supposed to be at a mun now, but i feel too crappy and the snot won't stop, so i think i'll just be a bother if i went]

phone update: i got the lg g4 on the 14th of june. dad bought it while i was out doing volunteer work, chucked it in my room, and conveniently forgot to tell me about it. so i went out drinking with friends, reached home a bit past midnight, and saw some phone manuals on my bed - like wtf? i was tired and a bit buzzed, so i went to take a shower. then i came back, turned on my laptop, and saw the phone beside it. i legit like, went a bit crazy. i sat up till 3 fiddling with the phone until i was satisfied. so like, it took me two hours to set everything up and familiarise myself with it. i love this phone. i love the lg g4. i love it.